Credit Where Credit Is Due

So I have this “friend”……

Say this “friend” of mine has a 5 year old son, who sometimes struggles with constipation. Say that because of a combination of events (and major oversight on my “friend’s” part) her son has not had a bowel movement in over a week. My “friend” feels really awful…

She should feel awful. Above anything is the health of her children. What was she thinking? Stupid woman. For as angry and ashamed as I am of her, I feel even worse for her poor child. He deserves a much better mom than the one he got dealt. She is such a failure. She should have realized 4 or 5 days ago that he needed to “go”…but did she? No! She was too busy with the schedule and housework to realize that he was having a problem. It doesn’t matter that he goes to school two days a week, he never goes # 2 at school, and she knows that! She is clearly incapable, and her children pay the price.

I would NEVER say that (and can’t think of once when I’ve even thought it) to a mom. But I say that to myself all the time. Because in case you didn’t realize, that “friend” is me, and that is the voice in my head this evening.

I once heard someone say, “That if you take credit for your child’s good behavior, you have to take credit for their bad behavior.” I don’t remember who said it, but I have repeated that so many times…and today I propose an addition to that saying: if you take credit for good parenting you also have to take credit for bad parenting.

A friend of mine (an actual friend this time) whose children are younger than mine mentioned the other day, that no one ever told him so much of parenting is about “digestion”. I never really thought about that before, but it is so true. We worry about what they eat, how much they eat, how much they pee, and where they poop. I am not so far from this part of parenthood…how could I let it get so bad? That is Parenting 101….and I flunked.

Tomorrow I hope to be able to take credit for some good parenting.